Movin' & Shakin' in Ottawa

I was sitting at work on Wednesday this week when something strange happened. Its crazy busy these days because of IFRS transition deadline slowly moving closer and companies getting more stressed out about how much there is to do … DON’T STOP READING! This blog is not about accounting. I promise.

Anyway – I was sitting at work writing a paper about the appropriate accounting treatment for precious metals stored on premises that an entity has the right to use but no legal title to …. Hahaha joking! I promise that is the last accounting reference. I thought it would be funny to write that because I just said this blog would not be about accounting and then I wrote about accounting but I realize its probably irritating so I’ll stop now and get on with the story.

Debit.

Ok that’s the last one seriously.

SO – I’m at work, sitting in my office, in the accounting zone when all of a sudden things start jumping around. I work on the 8^th floor and sometimes when someone is walking quickly or when workmen are in, the floor shakes a bit. So at first I figured the floor was moving because of that. Then there was a definite lurch and I realized that perhaps there was something more serious going on if the entire building was moving. To clarify: My thought process was nowhere near as calm as it is written here. In reality I grabbed my desk with both hands, made a funny gurgling noise in my throat and thought ‘I can’t believe I am going to die whilst squinting at my laptop writing accounting advice!’ The moving and shaking went on for a few seconds, which sounds short but believe me, on the 8^th floor of a 20 floor building, this is not short. This is a long time to contemplate the amount of concrete above you and the distance below you before you’re on solid ground …

When the shaking semi-stopped I got up from my desk and crept (literally, I was tiptoeing … I guess something in my subconscious thought this would stop the building from collapsing? I don’t really know.) to my door. I stuck my head out and asked, “What the f*#$ was that?” Colleagues all over the office were standing in their doorways looking stunned. Katie was in her doorway looking as terrified as I felt and was the first to answer my eloquently worded question … ‘I think that was an earthquake.’

I’ve never been in an earthquake before and I don’t think your first experience should be whilst sitting in a high rise. As I processed this information, Lynn one of our partners emerged from her office and reacted in a way I could only dream of ever being able to react. She calmly announced to us all ‘Well that was freaky! I think anyone who is feeling uncomfortable should evacuate down the stairwell. I am going to use this opportunity to get some lunch.’ How cool is she? I was almost crying with fear. Literally. I had the big lump in my throat and was holding on by a thread. The only thing that stopped me from crying was the fact that no one else was crying and I didn’t want to look like a loser. I can never be as cool in a crisis as Lynn. Fact.

So we all headed to the stairwell in an orderly fashion while Lynn calmly told us all about the construction laws in Canada that require buildings to be earthquake proof.

We made it out to the street in one piece. The streets were PACKED with people. Every office building in the city had evacuated and everyone was trying to figure out what was going on. Most office buildings promptly sent their employees home for the day.

We were waiting (hoping?) for some sort of similar instruction when we heard that standing in the street next to a high rise building is the worst thing to do after an earthquake. The best place to be is in the building under your desk. True story. I don’t believe it. How on earth can my desk protect me from tones on concrete and metal falling on top of me? My desk does not look sturdy enough for me to stand on and I’m quite sure I don’t weigh as much as 12 stories of a building (despite all the Canadian bacon I’ve consumed in the last 9 months) …

Either way we all headed back up to our desks where we sat feeling jittery for the rest of the afternoon. The earthquake was a 5.5 on the Richter scale and the epicenter was 50kms from Ottawa … madness. It was felt as far away as NYC!! People in Toronto also felt it. I know this because Mel called me from Toronto freaking out (cuteness!). In addition … I think this is cool … some people in our office were on a conference call with Toronto when the earthquake hit. The Ottawa folks said ‘Woah! Can you feel that?’ And the Toronto folks were all ‘Huh?’ Then a little while later the Toronto folks were like ‘What the eff??’ Classic. My first ever earthquake experience. It was not fun. It freaked me out. They should not have them anymore.

Oh and for those who are wondering what happened to Joep during all of this? He was winding down after networking at a golf tournament in Toronto at the time and noticed something moving but figured someone had dropped a fridge or something. These are his exact words. I am not lying. Earthquake versus fridge dropping. Hmmm.

He also won a fancy Callaway golf club at this tournament. It his is current most prized possession. I have fallen in ranking to #2 on Joep’s list of favourite things in the world. That Callaway better watch it …

So that was my excitement for the week! An earthquake. Sure beats a boring accounting story right?

Oh and finally – I called the mother ship later that day and asked if she had seen the news yet. She then listed off a complete summary of news in Australia this week (headlined with the Socceroos followed by Kevin 07’s fall from prime ministerial glory) … when I was able to interrupt I told her that there had been an earthquake in Ottawa. She went silent for a second before calmly asking me ‘Ah Genni, would you not think about coming home?’ Followed by ‘Between hurricanes and earthquakes and motorcycles I don’t know what we’re going to do with you!’ (**Remember to read all of this in an Irish accent**) awwww cuteness mother ship.

And finally finally – Re the precious metals? I think you should recognize it at fair value adjusted at each period end for the spot rate at that day. Why haven’t you stopped reading already? Seriously! This is boring stuff! Don’t judge me for writing it if you’re still reading it …

Bonsai!

So I was unsure about whether or not this story is blog appropriate but then I realized that most people who read this know what Joep and I are like and won’t be offended by the antics … Mother ship you know what we’re like so we have nothing to hide from you!

This last week has been full of randomness. Both Joep and I were in Toronto for work for the majority of the week which was exhausting. I got home on Thursday evening and when I got in the taxi at the airport Mr T immediately launched into a long story about his Bollywood career. Apparently he was a big shot Bollywood movie song writer who lost all his money in the GFC. So now he drives taxi’s but still writes Bollywood songs and records them. I thought he was making it all up but when I got home and googled his name it turns out he has actually made a lot of music.

Anyhow – As he was regaling me with stories of his Bollywood infamy he insisted on playing some of his music for me. It. Was. Blaring. So loud. People were staring at us all around and I was moderately embarrassed but more than anything I was highly amused and kept giving him the big thumbs up sign and shouting to him about how great his music was. Bless him he was so proud! He even showed me some of his Bollywood moves! Fancy!

He also told me that he has recorded his most recent song and it is going to be a big hit in Bollywood and he thinks also in Hollywood! It is about girls who like to diet too much. He explained this to me and at the end of this asked me if I had ever thought about modeling. I said that no I hadn’t ever thought about it (keeping in mind that I have not always been as ludicrously good looking as I am these days) … I also added that I am not at all photogenic (this is factual. I have been told this clearly, to my face, more than once).

He spent the remainder of the cab ride trying to convince me to star in his Bollywood movie clip. He said that girls like me who are tall with shiny faces (yes, exact words, shiny faces … what?) are all the rage in India these days. I have his card. I’ll think about his offer. It could be an interesting change from accounting. Plus he promised that I could wear a sari. That would be cool.

So after a long week of working and travelling we were happy to relax in Ottawa this weekend. On Saturday night we planned on having a nice grown up dinner party with Mikey & Anne-Marie (I think I introduced you all to these guys before).

The evening started off in a very civilized manner. Food was eaten, cocktails were mixed and enjoyed and a few bottles of wine were consumed. OK so perhaps more than a few. As the evening wore on the boys drifted out the balcony while Anne-Marie and I relaxed inside.

At some stage late in the evening Joep burst into the living room announcing that he needed the wheel of cheese. Explanation: Bas & Kamiel brought a wheel of cheese with them from Holland as a gift. It is delicious. Whilst on the balcony Joep and Mikey had heard the downstairs neighbors having a party. They struck up a conversation with some of the party guests and before you know it, Joep had offered them the wheel of cheese. I cannot add more clarity to this situation. I am as confused as everyone else re why Joep would offer them a wheel of cheese. In fact, I’m not sure that Joep even knows why he offered them a wheel of cheese.

Nevertheless, the cheese was offered and Joep is not one to renege on a promise! So he got the wheel of cheese out of the fridge and used one of my scarves to lower it down to the 9^th floor balcony.

Mission accomplished we returned to our evening of wine and laughs until there was a knock at the door … Joep came bounding in from outside (yes bounding, that is the only way to describe the over-excited gangly way that Joep runs around when there is too much excitement going on) announcing that the party guests from downstairs were here!!

And so the night hit a new high … before we knew it we had a number of randoms in our house raving about Dutch cheese and enjoying the hospitality that only Joep is capable of offering.

The next little while is a blur of new faces and a couple of familiar faces (thank goodness Anne-Marie & Mikey were still there!) and random chats but the party wound down eventually and the original 4 dinner party guests were the last left standing. By this stage things had gotten well and truly out of hand. As expected there was plenty of dancing with both couples bringing out their fanciest moves leading to aches and pains galore on Sunday. As the dancing wound down a surfing contest took place in the living room using a chopping board as the surf board.

The evening ended when the 2 boys began wrestling. Why oh why does it always end with wrestling?? As the boys literally tumbled around the room and food and furniture flew around the place (in my mind they were behaving like monkey’s but I’m not sure if that was something they were doing on purpose or not) Anne-Marie and I decided it was time to separate them and call it a night.

We managed to get them out the front door of the apartment and as we made our way down the hallway, Anne-Marie & I walking normally and the boys tumbling (literally), things took a turn for the worse.

Joep was ‘assisting’ Mikey in his tumbling efforts and accidentally rolled Mikey into the door of one of our neighbouring apartments. Mikey was just about back on his feet when the apartment door sprung open and a ninja jumped out!

This is no joke. A small Asian man jumped out of the apartment crouched with karate chop hands out in front of him and shouted …. Well there is some confusion about what he shouted. In my mind he clearly shouted ‘BONSAI!’ Joep heard it as well and concurs that is sounded exactly like ‘BONSAI!’ but we both agree that it is possible he shouted ‘WHO’S THERE?!’ Either way Mikey literally levitated on the spot with the fear of being shouted at while Anne-Marie & I desperately pushed the elevator button.

We made a quick getaway in the elevator whilst collapsing in convulsions of laughter. It was priceless.

After saying our goodbyes on the ground floor Joep and I headed back upstairs. Upon arrival at the 10^th floor I spotted our ninja neighbor, standing still in ninja pose, outside his door. I walked the opposite direction to Joep and pretended I didn’t know him. Joep then went and spoke to the ninja to apologize for our rowdy behaviour. He did not seem willing to accept Joep’s apology and demanded to know which apartment we lived in. Joep told him a number that is not technically our apartment. (Point of note: I was hiding behind a fire extinguisher at this point in time giggling away at the sight of giant Joep being afraid of the tiny ninja).

As the ninja continued to harass Joep about our rowdiness, Joep decided to take a stand by pointing out to the ninja that we always hear him playing his classical music loudly. This seemed to somewhat placate him. I don’t know why. It was a silly come back because I am quite sure that playing classical music loudly in the morning does not equate to rolling a grown man into someones door late at night. Still this tactic worked and Joep was allowed to go home. We both then hid for a little while and waited for the ninja to disappear before dashing into our apartment.

We haven’t received a notice of eviction yet so I think we’re safe. Although I am still nervous walking down the corridor for fear that the ninja will strike again. This is condo living at its greatest.

Another NYC reunion!

There is nothing quite like a bunch of girls reuniting to make your stomach hurt from laughter. This weekend my abs got the best workout they have had in a while when I headed to NYC to meet up with the Perth gals for a weekend reunion.

The last couple of weeks have been full with man related activities while Bas & Kamiel have been visiting. This included lots of beer drinking and eating steaks as big as my head. It was lovely and Bas & Kamiel are fantastic house guests but I am a girls girl at heart so a weekend away with the girls while the men manned it up in Algonquin Provincial Park was exactly what the doctor ordered.

Friday morning I was up at 4am with a pounding headache which I blame entirely on Bas & Kamiel & their relaxed holiday attitude towards reasonable bed time hours. I made my flight to NYC with a brief transfer in Toronto where I met up with Mel! Let the laughter begin. The flight to NYC was spent catching up and gossiping and sharing wedding planning stories … we’re both on the same page with this so that was a good thing. Upon arrival in NYC we realized that neither of us had a map. Typical! Mel at least had had the good sense to print out the address of our apartment (this brings me back to our Euro travelling days … Mel was always more organized. I will never catch up.) … we caught the train downtown and managed to negotiate our way to our apartment. The beauty of NYC is that even when you are map-less it is pretty close to impossible to get lost.

Upon arrival at the apartment we met up with the gals, sang a big HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Smelaroo and had some good chats before hitting the streets of NYC to grab food and begin the shopping. Now I have never been a good shopped. I don’t enjoy it. In fact, more than that, I dislike it. True story. It makes me question whether the stories my sister told me as a child re me being adopted are actually true.

Nevertheless, despite my severe dislike of shopping, there is something about hitting the stores in NYC with 6 girls that is a bit … well, contagious! Within hours we all found ourselves something we loved and simply HAD to purchase. It could also be the fact that we had found a cinema where tickets for Sex & the City were NOT completely sold out so we jumped on this opportunity to see the ultimate chick flick in NYC! I now own a dress that I am unsure if I will ever wear due to its flamboyant style. What can I say? I got carried away with the NYC fashions … but I life in Ottawa. Uh-oh.

Despite the frivolous spending (or perhaps because of it) we had a fantastic afternoon before heading back to the apartment to get ready for dinner. By this stage Inna had left us for greener pastures only to return shortly afterwards with her pal. This meant that 6 girls were then getting ready in 2 bedrooms of the apartment and unable to wander freely from room to room to get ready. Needless to say it was a challenge! But we made it and, all dolled up, we hit the streets to head out to dinner. Mexican was the order of the night for no reason other than we wanted margarita’s!! Mission accomplished we enjoyed a fantastic meal and some good laughs before heading out to dance.

We spent Friday evening on a roof top bar on Fifth Avenue and it was more than a little bit glamorous. Except when Em insulted our table neighbors by making racist comments. JOKING! Only a little bit actually. So Em was sitting at the end of our group and next door was a table of African American men. Em, as is her natural charm, struck up a conversation with them. Now there is some confusion re what the opening lines of this conversation were but all that we heard was the biggest of the men belly laughing and shouting … according to him Em’s opening line had been ‘You’re black, you must play basketball!’ Em denies this 150%. I am not sure what her story is re what she said but this dude thought she was hilarious and an instant friendship was struck. ‘Bubba’ as Em then dubbed him (*cringe*) seemed to find Em positively refreshing! Classic.

We spent the night enjoying a few drinks and incorporated a bit of groove shaking before the early morning start caught up on us and it was home time. Or was it? A group of Aussie girls walking home in NYC is obviously a recipe for disaster. We managed to get ourselves well and truly lost which is actually really hard to do in NYC! But we did it. After much aimless wandering we eventually made our way home and crashed.

The next morning there were stories shared about the previous night (lead largely by Inna who is the team leader for scandal) … before getting ready for our day’s excursion to the YANKEES!!

Yankee Stadium – The Yankees versus the Cleveland Indians! Isn’t it intriguing that a group of 6 girls raised in Perth, WA  who know nothing about baseball & were raised on AFL and cricket were so excited to see the Yankees? We are certainly products of consumerism. Yankee Stadium is a pretty cool place. The atmosphere is exactly what you would expect it to be and we spent the next few hours eating hotdogs, onion rings, popcorn and drinking beers in the 30+ degree sun. It. Was. Heavenly.

The game however was not very exciting. Sorry America but baseball just isn’t the sport for me! However, just like cricket, it is a great sport for relaxing and chatting and enjoying yourself in the sunshine. Oh and there was one exciting part of the game when the pitcher got hit square in the face with a ball … ouch! I’ll be honest with you … that’s probably the only time I paid attention to the game. Oh AND when the little cleaning men game out to rake the dirt (is that what they were doing? I have no idea actually) but they sang and danced to YMCA at the same time and it was awesome!!

We left the game before it finished (don’t judge us, lots of American’s did the same thing) and headed to Central Park to relax in the sun. Oh New York! I could stay forever. True story.

Rays soaked up and naps in the sun enjoyed we headed for home to get ready for dinner. At some point during the day an executive decision had been made that we neeeeeeded Italian food. So after dolling ourselves up we headed out to SoHo for a bite to eat in Little Italy. People bag on Little Italy for being touristic. I love it there. Great atmosphere, heaps of great restaurants AND an awesome street market with games that let you win stuffed toys! (Joepinator’s heaven) We found a fantastic garden spot for dinner and proceeded to enjoy a few bottles of wine and a whole lot of food. A whole lot. We were also easily the loudest table in the restaurant with our loud stories and belly laughs. I do believe there were tearful moments at the table due to excessive laughing. I certainly had a few big belly laughs myself!

After pigging out and spending a loooong time at our table chatting we moseyed on through Little Italy. I hit up one of the games places and managed to win Joepinator a toy. Well. I didn’t actually win it. The dude was a total scam artist and I am not very good and realizing when I am being scammed but thankfully Em was with me and she realized it was a scam and we got a bear for free. Phew!!

Having over eaten and soaked up enough atmosphere for one day we called it a night and headed back to the apartment to chill out J

Sunday was the last day for Mel & I (the other gals had a few more days to enjoy) and it was spent … shopping!! After a very successful few hours I the stores it was sadly time to call it a day. Mel & I grabbed our bags and headed for home late Sunday afternoon in time for work on Monday.

It was, yet again, a fantastic NYC weekend! Too many laughs most of which have been censored from this blog but will be remembered for some time to come! Looking forward to the next reunion which is most likely to be in Perth – hometown!